BEPSALMONE YOUTH CAMP 2013

Hello guys! It’s been awhile since I last posted, but here I am! Anyway, I just came back from a church youth camp (it was called BePsalmOne), so I thought I’d share my experience there!

This youth camp was special because our church invited incoming primary sixes to sign up as well, and quite a number did (it’s really heartwarming), including my little brother. It’s really been incredible seeing him grow through the camp. The night before, we had a dialogue that went something like this:

Me: “You excited for camp?”

Him: “Yeah.”

Me: “Make friends, okay?”

Him: “I don’t want friends.”

Me: “Oh, okay. But play nice, yeah?”

Him: “Why should I play nice if I don’t want friends?”

Me: “For the sake of everybody else?”

Him: “Who needs friends?”

And when we were waiting to register at the church, he was looking around like a lost kid, and whispering stuff like “I don’t know anybody here” to me. I shouldn’t have been worried, but I was. God really alleviated my worries. By the middle of that first day (or even earlier than that, actually), I saw him prancing through the church with his camp group, shouting and just generally being his own energetic, charismatic self. During the first altar call at camp, I witnessed him go forward and kneel. And some time in the middle of the camp, he walked up to me and quoted the whole Psalm 1. My brother never checks his WhatsApp. Ever. But at the end of the camp, he was checking his camp group’s WhatsApp every free moment he had. He commented that it felt like we’d been away for a really long time, and that we’d come back different. I agree.

The second big thing is… pretty big (ha ha ha). Throughout the weeks (months, maybe) leading up to camp, I was feeling pretty bad. I was feeling really lonely, that I was useless and couldn’t keep friends, didn’t have friends who were actively there for me, that sort of annoying angsty stuff. During the camp, we set up an “encouragement board”. Each of us had an envelope on it, and people could write encouraging notes and put them in other people’s envelopes. Every time I walked past it, I told myself not to check my envelope, for fear of discovering that nobody had written to me (which I was convinced would be the case, given my pre-camp attitude). But God really provided. He gave me a supporting, enthusiastic camp group. And, praise the Lord, at the end of the camp, when I had to check my envelope, I found that it was full of notes. I had to keep myself from crying right there and then on the shuttle bus. It was such a timely reminder that my church community is 100% in it with me, that there are people who are looking out for me and my walk with God. I felt so guilty for ignoring this blatant fact, and for glorifying myself out of pride, giving myself an ego trip thinking that I had it sooooo bad.

Third thing! You guys may or may not know (you can read the full thing here) that since secondary one, I’ve had a gigantic fear of singing in public. But this camp, I somehow got over this irritating phobia. I can’t even tell you how; it was really all God. During one particular worship session, I decided that neither God nor I really care how well I sing. Both of us are more concerned about the lyrics, the words I’m telling Him. And because God thinks that, I shouldn’t really care what other people think. I promise you, I was off-key, off-tune, off-everything. On the last night of camp, some of the campers and committee organized an impromptu worship session with just two guitars and a handful of people. I went, and that was really when God just broke down the walls. I had no fear. It was around 2 in the morning, my voice sounded terrible, but I felt free to worship, for the first time in a long time. So if you guys are worried about singing because you think you can’t, or don’t like it, or don’t want to, don’t worry. Our God is greater than your lack of talent (and sometimes you’re not lacking talent, just confidence!).

Speaking of worship, the worship at camp was breathtaking. On the last night of camp, we had a final service. It really was powerful. You could feel God’s energy running through the entire campsite, you could barely hear yourself because the people next to you were shouting and crying out to God. The worship team later told us that two of the songs they played had been unplanned, that the Spirit had simply led them to all play those songs. Wow. They also told us that there were moments that instead of the worship leader leading the congregation, the congregation led the worship team. That’s pretty great. It was really beautiful to be in the middle of this sea of genuine, desperate praise and worship. I pray that we’ll all keep up this level of worship. (The God at camp is the same God in the air-conditioned service hall.) And yet, it’s still not nearly what God deserves. He deserves so much more. It’s really amazing how amazing He is.

God really is wonderful. I was reminded of that through this camp. He is awesome beyond words. I can’t get over the fact that we have nothing worth giving, nothing perfect to offer, nothing pure to show, and yet He’s still here, taking what we have and giving us a place in His Kingdom. He’s still loving us, patiently guiding us, still letting us have the power of choice. I can’t believe we have friends who aren’t making the choice to say yes to Him. It really is our responsibility as believers to fight for these people, to fight for their souls, to live our lives the best we can, because who knows who we’ll impact, who God will touch and change through us, right?

I guess I really want to thank the committee for putting everything together and making sure it happened. A lot of heartbreaking/heartwarming dialogues with God only happened because of this camp, a lot of friendships forged, a lot of change. And it required a lot of time and effort. So kudos to the committee! Big thanks also to the pastors who had to step up last minute, whose every word was truly God-anointed. These words changed lives. Thank God for godly pastors! And then to the worship team and sound engineers for facilitating great worship sessions! Thank you to the shepherds for guiding us and setting great examples. Thank you to the campers for making the experience worthwhile, for being enthusiastic, encouraging, and hungrily seeking the Lord. It was so, so, so encouraging. I’m so, so, so blessed. And thank You, God. I cannot thank Him enough. Ahh. Thank You for wonderful weather, for wonderful people, for wonderful food, for wonderful games, wonderful sermons, services, worship sessions, accommodation, music, moments, thank You for You.

I think I’ll stop here (I could go on for forever… I think I already have. Haha). I want to share this song, I discovered it through that last worship session. I think it's pretty great.

God bless you guys, and if you need prayers, feel free to let me know!